I know what you’re thinking. You’ve spent hours, days, weeks, years determining your ideal garage. You spent time pouring over every detail, every facet, every light switch, and type of floor coating to give you that flawless glean.
You’ve researched classics, new age hypercars, perfect German saloons, and all manner of lightweight, high-horsepower two-wheeled track weapons and cafe hellions. You’ve done your research, you have the receipts. There’s just one problem: You’re all wrong.
The unquestionably correct, the never get bored, never have to buy a car or motorcycle ever again perfect garage is one comprised of the McLaren 720S, the Porsche Taycan Turbo S, and a Honda Africa Twin. I shouldn’t need to explain, but for those in the back, here’s why these are the right choices.
The McLaren 720S is the perfect supercar. Though it’s initial design was somewhat controversial—those headlights especially—as the car has aged its brash looks have softened and I’ve really come to understand that Woking just knocked the 720S out of the park. The looks, the presence, the billionaire doors that go up like this [*makes wing-flapping motion in my living room], it’s all there.
More importantly, McLaren delivered perfection in the 720S’ performance with a tower of power that is that twin-turbocharged 4.0-liter V8. Good God, is it some daemon from Norse mythology. Lightning doesn’t seem as instantaneous as the 720S’ propulsion, and yet, it also somehow offers Rolls-esque ride opulence from its inventive adaptive sway bars. I think it’s the best supercar available.
Then you have the Porsche Taycan Turbo S, which not only ticks off the More Than Two Seats box for my family needs, but also ticks off the I’m Not Killing The Planet one, too. Before the pandemic swept the globe, I went to Georgia and road tripped the Taycan Turbo S. I fell madly in love with the machine. There’s a duality to its essence that’s just not found in other machines that I find fascinating. Futuristic, yet familiar. Undeniably gorgeous with its concept car design, but you still see Porsche cues.
And savagely quick, yet docile when you’re just tootling along. Its rapidity had me giggling from Georgia to Florida, but so did its hunger and tactile response after finding twisty roads. You can also totally get 300+ miles of range out of it, as well as having the fastest chargers available, and it’s the best EV and four-door around.
Finally, Honda’s semi-new CRF1000L Africa Twin. What. A. Machine. To me, this motorcycle is Honda’s crowning jewel. With knobby tires, 10-inches of suspension travel (the Ford Raptor only has four more), an upright seating position, knuckle guards, and a spirit of adventure only rivaled by Sir Edmund Hillary, there’s no better motorcycle on the road.
You may say, “Wait, Jonathon, didn’t you profess your lust for the Ducati Panigale V4 S not too long ago?” Yes, but that was, as you say, lust. It’s a great motorcycle with a wildly addictive song, but if I’m going to ride something day-in and day-out, I want something that can take me out into the Rockies, explore the Okavango, cross the Tiber, and come out the other side ready for more. The Africa Twin does that and more.
I should have more wiggle room in my picks and open up the floor for all of you to tell me how wrong I am, to tell me how I should’ve picked the Tesla Model S, the Husqvarna Vitpilen, a number of classic race cars or supercars or motorcycles. But my logic is sound. These machines tick the right boxes. They tickle my fancy. And if given an unlimited bank account, these are what I’d buy.
I may be going marginally stir crazy, trapped in my 1,100 square foot apartment, watching the world go on outside my door as I continually stuff my face with homemade banana bread and what any sane human would call stupendously generous whiskey pours, but I know I’m right. I can feel the righteousness of my picks in my bones.
But I’m always up for a good discussion, and I’m bored inside anyway. What three vehicles would you pick?
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